It's too painful to cry

I'm finally at my breaking point. I'm sick of the bullshit, I'm sick of the pain, I sick of the way these people treat me. I'm not your fucking dog, you don't fucking know me. Who are you to tell me about my life and what I can and can't do. I've suffered years, and years upon years of this. Leave me alone, stop all the pain. Stop treating me like a dirty old rag. I'm not your punching bag, I don't wanna take these hits anymore. I put up this wall, a huge wall that can take so much before it starts crumbling down. At this point I ask myself why me? What did I ever do to deserve this shit. Why am I constantly thingy about cutting myself but refraining from it because I care too much about my family. Why have I thought of the world being better off with out me. What have could I have possibly done to deserve so much hatred? Nothing. Nobody deserves to be treated like that. I don't DESERVE anything from you. You don't have that right to decide whether or not I deserve something because you don't know what dues I've made. The sacrifices I've had to deal with. I don't give a fuck how much money you have or where your from, cause the only person who judges me is God because when everyone else fails me besides my family who will always be there for me. God has the power to heal my wounds, and is because of him, my faith stays strong because he makes me feel better about myself. I'm sad, and nobody can comfort me.